Why is it everything you want just out of reach???

So about a year ago maybe a little less.  I had the perfect guy. He is sweet, kind, cute, nice, and will all ways have my heart.  I was just diagnosed and I got really scaredand didnt want to put anyone through what I was going through.  So I pushed him away.  Let me say that is not the thing to do.  So we started talking on the phone and web a few months ago. 

I thought it was going good and then he would not tell his parents we were talking.  My first thought was that he was ashamed of me.  Then he sent an email to his parents and it somehow went to me too.  when I checked my email it said it was a forward so I asked if he sent me something.  Cause his email often sends viagra links to me.  He said he didn't so I told him I was forwarding it back to him.  So I checked the box and hit forward.  Well it opened the email and to my suprise it was a letter to his parents.  After reading this letter I was shocked to learn that the guy I loved liked someone else. 

 So I blew a fuse and then calmed down and relized that he does not live in this state and he could do what ever he wanted.  Than later that evening he sent me another forward and it was another letter to his parents saying how much he loved me.  I love him with all my heart and hope someday soon he will be mine again.  They say that if you love someone let them go and if they come back it is ment to be.  I hope he comes back.  I have been married and devoriced once before and I always said I would never do that again.  but after 6 years with this wonderful guy I would marry him in a heart beat.  Any person I know will tell you I am not the easiest person to live with and He did it for 6 years so he has to be my superman.  I get the best valentines day ever this year because he is coming to spend it with me.  If I have it my way he wont be leaving and we will live happily ever after.  Anyways back to the just out of my reach part.  So the guy I love lives in Wyoming and I live in Washington.  We can talk on the phone and web chat but I don't get to hold him or kiss him.  To me it feels like he is so far away.  If you have any ideas on how I can make him mine.  Let me know cause I am out of ideas.